“The way we speak reflects the way we think and the way we think shapes the world we build.”
Today, if we scroll through social media, sit with friends or listen to a casual conversation, abusive words seem so frequent. Abuse has become as common as adding salt to food, automatic and unquestioned. It is used to express excitement, anger, humor or even affection. Most of the time, people don’t even bother to pause; what they are saying is not a commendable thing. In my opinion, if a person can’t even express his thoughts without an abusive word, then there is no person weaker than him. When harsh language becomes normal, then harsh behaviour can begin to feel normal too.
At the same time we can’t only blame this generation. Let’s be honest, in a middle-class household, many of us have heard these words while growing up. Our grandparents, parents or other elders sometimes use this language casually, especially during anger or humor. As kids, we listened and learned the same. Over time, those words did not even feel shocking; they felt familiar. Recognising this is not about blaming previous but about understanding how patterns are passed on, and now it is our responsibility to break this cycle.
Another serious problem is that many of these words are targeted towards women. And ironically, today, even women use the same words casually. When disrespectful terms become jokes, their deeper impact is ignored. Words that degrade or objectify slowly reduce sensitivity in society. If we normalise the language that insults dignity, then we are slowly normalising disrespect itself.
At this point, it is worth remembering a sholk from Sanskrit teaching:
fप्रयवाक्यप्रदानेन सवˇ तुष्यिन्त जन्तवः। तस्मात्तदेव वक्तव्यं वचने का द रद्रता॥
Priyavākya-pradānena sarve tuṣyanti jantavaḥ | Tasmāttadēva vaktavyaṃ vacanē kā daridratā ||
It means that all creatures are pleased by the speaking of kind and pleasant words. Therefore, one should speak only pleasant words; what poverty (or stinginess) is there in speaking well? This reminds us that our ancient values were so strong that we talked politely with every creature. But with the declining Sanskrit language, the value it holds is also declining. The point is not to speak in Sanskrit but to speak respectfully. It is not an outdated idea; it is essential.
We must think about what world we are handing to our younger generations. If in very small inconveniences, we respond with abuse instead of patience, what will the younger ones learn from us? Many of the kids have started adapting this lifestyle of using abusive words casually, but it is not too late today. Before correcting them, we have to first understand that real strength is not shown by speaking abusive words loudly, but through control and dignity.
While the internet argues over reclaiming slurs, there is also a quieter effort happening on the ground. In Haryana, one man Sunil Jaghlan has spent more than a decade trying to change the way people speak. In 2014, after witnessing a mixed gathering deteriorate into abusive language, he started the Gaali Bandh Abhiyan (Stop-Abuse Campaign) from his village Bibipur in Jind district. Instead of only posting a post on social media to criticize the problem, the campaign encouraged people to consciously remove abusive words from daily conversations. Programmes were organised in schools and community groups where they were asked to take simple pledges to speak respectfully. It is a reminder that real social change does not always trend online. Sometimes it begins quietly in schools, homes and villages, slowly reforming habits and reminding people that dignity in language is a strength, not a weakness.
Because in the end, civilization does not end with weapons, they would rather die by decline in respectful words.